Notes App Confessions: I Take the Blame, But I Still Miss Them
Oh, the things I wish I could tell the people I once considered my forever.
Sometimes I feel the urge to text them,
invite them for coffee,
or gather at that same old taco place we made our friendship headquarters our whole college life.
Send the meme that somehow corresponds to our silly little inside joke that only we would get.
Or tell them about that boy with the crazy lore who ended up in my class two years later.
Oh, the things I wish I could tell the people I once considered my forever.
But now, all they are in my phone are a collection of numbers.
Removed names.
Silly emojis that once matched our every inside joke.
Nicknames that felt like our own secret language.
Those numbers I once had pinned to the top of my messages
now live on my blocked list.
It’s a void.
A deep, aching hole you feel when you're forced to mourn someone who's still alive.
Sometimes I wonder if I was the only villain in our downfall.
I said things.
Let my emotions win.
Maybe I burned the bridge.
But I also imagined us one day sitting back at that taco spot,
laughing hysterically about how I left the group chat—
and how y’all renamed it something shady right after.
It was supposed to be temporary.
I thought we'd always find our way back.
I take the blame.
But I also take the credit for saying sorry—
instantly. Wholeheartedly. Genuinely.
I still wonder if you ever read it.
📌 If I could tell you everything, I’d say:
The nun? Yeah, she’s dating a football player now.
I don’t think her and Birthday Girl are friends anymore.
Peace, Love, and Happiness was spotted on a smoke break with the neighbors.
Rapunzel quit the baseball team.
James? Still more unhinged than ever.
You all would’ve hated Raya Man at first.
But when he came to BR? You’d say he was the best one yet.
Duck texted me out of the blue.
And I drove to New Orleans alone for spring break.
I think you’d be proud of me.
Or maybe you wouldn’t.
No one speaks this language anymore.
But if you're out there,
and you ever stumble across this corner of the internet…
I miss you.
I think about you.
And in another universe,
maybe all our kids are piling into Auntie JIW’s minivan on the way to a Junior League Southern Jags baseball clinic.
"It’s easy to miss people when you remember them by their best moments."
– Sincerely, Unhinged